Richard III – Act 1 Scene 2

LADY ANNE

Set down, set down your honourable load,

Stop here, put down your honourable load,

If honour may be shrouded in a hearse,

If honour can be carried in a coffin,

Whilst I awhile obsequiously lament

So I can ceremoniously mourn

Th’ untimely fall of virtuous Lancaster.

Lancastrian King Henry’s early death.

Poor key-cold figure of a holy king,

Poor king, cold like an old metallic key,

Pale ashes of the house of Lancaster,

The House of Lancaster turned into dust,

Thou bloodless remnant of that royal blood,

Your bloodless body once had royal blood;

Be it lawful that I invocate thy ghost

Am I allowed to conjure up your ghost

To hear the lamentations of poor Anne,

To hear me – tragic Anne – wail mournfully,

Wife to thy Edward, to thy slaughtered son,

The wife of Edward, your own murdered son,

Stabbed by the self-same hand that made these wounds!

Stabbed by the same hands that have made your wounds!

Lo, in these windows that let forth thy life

Oh, in these gashes – window-like – that killed you

I pour the helpless balm of my poor eyes.

I’ll drop these useless tears from my sad eyes.

O, cursed be the hand that made these holes!

God damn him that impaled you with these stab wounds!

Cursed the heart that had the heart to do it!

And damn the heart that had the heart to do this!

Cursed the blood that let this blood from hence!

And damn the blood that made your blood flow from you!

More direful hap betide that hated wretch

Worse curses on the hated, wretched man –

That makes us wretched by the death of thee

Who’s made us wretched by the death of you –

Than I can wish to wolves – to spiders, toads,

Than I can wish on wolves or toads or spiders

Or any creeping venomed thing that lives!

Or any living thing that’s poisonous!

If ever he have child, abortive be it,

And if he has a child, make it born early –

Prodigious, and untimely brought to light,

An inauspicious birth, born prematurely –

Whose ugly and unnatural aspect

Whose ugly and unnatural appearance

May fright the hopeful mother at the view,

Will scare the hopeful mother when she sees it,

And that be heir to his unhappiness!

So it inherits his unhappiness!

If ever he have wife, let her be made

And if he has a wife, let her become

More miserable by the life of him

More miserable by spending life with him

Than I am made by my young lord and thee!

Than I am losing my husband and you!

Come now towards Chertsey with your holy load,

Come on, let’s go to Chertsey with the coffin,

Taken from Paul’s to be interred there;

Which we took from St Paul’s to be interred;

And still as you are weary of this weight,

And if you tire carrying this weight,

Rest you, whiles I lament King Henry’s corse.

Then rest, and I will grieve at Henry’s corpse.

RICHARD, DUKE OF GLOUCESTER

Stay, you that bear the corse, and set it down.

Stop there, pallbearers, and put down the corpse.

LADY ANNE

What black magician conjures up this fiend

What sorcerer has sent this devil here

To stop devoted charitable deeds?

To interrupt our sacred burial?

RICHARD, DUKE OF GLOUCESTER

Villains, set down the corse, or, by Saint Paul,

Villains, put down the corpse, or I will swear

I’ll make a corse of him that disobeys.

I’ll make a corpse of him that disobeys me.

GENTLEMAN

My lord, stand back, and let the coffin pass.

My lord, stand back, and let the coffin through.

RICHARD, DUKE OF GLOUCESTER

Unmannered dog, stand thou when I command.

Disgusting dog, stand still when I command you.

Advance thy halberd higher than my breast,

And raise your weapon higher than my chest

Or by Saint Paul I’ll strike thee to my foot,

Or by Saint Paul, I’ll chop you to the ground

And spurn upon thee, beggar, for thy boldness.

And trample on you, beggar, for your boldness.

LADY ANNE

What do you tremble? Are you all afraid?

Why are you trembling? Are you afraid?

Alas, I blame you not, for you are mortal,

I guess I cannot blame you, for you’re mortal,

And mortal eyes cannot endure the devil. –

And mortal beings cannot stand the devil.

Avaunt, thou dreadful minister of hell!

Clear off, you evil demon sent from hell!

Thou hadst but power over his mortal body,

You once had power over his live body;

His soul thou canst not have. Therefore be gone.

You cannot touch his soul. And so, clear off.

RICHARD, DUKE OF GLOUCESTER

Sweet saint, for charity, be not so curst.

Sweet saint, through kindness, do not be so rude.

LADY ANNE

Foul devil, for God’s sake hence, and trouble us not,

Foul devil, bugger off; for God’s sake, leave us,

For thou hast made the happy earth thy hell,

For you have made our happy earth your hell,

Filled it with cursing cries and deep exclaims.

By filling it with shrieks and wretched wailing.

If thou delight to view thy heinous deeds,

If you take pleasure witnessing your crimes,

Behold this pattern of thy butcheries.

Look at this pattern butchered in the King.

O gentlemen, see, see dead Henry’s wounds

Oh gentlemen, observe how Henry’s wounds

Open their congealed mouths and bleed afresh!

Have opened up again and bleed anew!

Blush, blush, thou lump of foul deformity;

You ought to be ashamed, you hunched-back lump;

For ’tis thy presence that exhales this blood

These cuts have started bleeding as you’re here,

From cold and empty veins where no blood dwells.

Spewing from cold and empty bloodless veins.

Thy deeds inhuman and unnatural

The dreadfully inhuman things you’ve done

Provokes this deluge most unnatural.

Has made this blood re-spew unnaturally.

O God! Which this blood mad’st, revenge his death!

Dear God – who made this blood – revenge his death!

O earth! Which this blood drink’st, revenge his death!

Dear earth – who drinks his blood – revenge his death!

Either heav’n with lightning strike the murd’rer dead;

Now, heaven kill the murderer with lightning,

Or earth gape open wide and eat him quick,

Or earth break open, swallowing him whole

As thou dost swallow up this good king’s blood,

As you have swallowed up this good king’s blood,

Which his hell-governed arm hath butchered!

Caused by his devil-arm that cut him open!

RICHARD, DUKE OF GLOUCESTER

Lady, you know no rules of charity,

My dear, you do not know charity’s rules,

Which renders good for bad, blessings for curses.

Which swaps bad deeds for good, curses for blessings.

LADY ANNE

Villain, thou know’st nor law of God nor man:

You know no law of God nor law of man, thug:

No beast so fierce but knows some touch of pity.

There’s no such beast that’s so devoid of pity.

RICHARD, DUKE OF GLOUCESTER

But I know none, and therefore am no beast.

I have no pity, thus I am no beast.

LADY ANNE

O wonderful, when devils tell the troth!

How wonderful when devils tell the truth!

RICHARD, DUKE OF GLOUCESTER

More wonderful, when angels are so angry.

More wonderful when angels get annoyed.

Vouchsafe, divine perfection of a woman,

Graciously, perfect woman, if you may,

Of these supposed crimes, to give me leave

Let me respond to these crimes I’m accused of,

By circumstance but to acquit myself.

And let me show, with proof, I’m innocent.

LADY ANNE

Vouchsafe, defused infection of a man,

Please let me, plague-sore of a man, explain

Of these known evils, but to give me leave

The evil acts you’ve done, and then allow me

By circumstance t’ accuse thy cursed self.

To charge your evil self by facts against you.

RICHARD, DUKE OF GLOUCESTER

Fairer than tongue can name thee, let me have

Lady, more beautiful than words convey,

Some patient leisure to excuse myself.

Give me some time to vindicate myself.

LADY ANNE

Fouler than heart can think thee, thou canst make

Man, more revolting than a mind can dream of,

No excuse current but to hang thyself.

You’ve no excuse, except to hang yourself.

RICHARD, DUKE OF GLOUCESTER

By such despair I should accuse myself.

By doing that, I’d charge myself as guilty.

LADY ANNE

And by despairing shalt thou stand excused

And such a desperate act just might excuse you

For doing worthy vengeance on thyself,

By executing justice on yourself

That didst unworthy slaughter upon others.

For killing others without any reason.

RICHARD, DUKE OF GLOUCESTER

Say that I slew them not?

What if I didn’t kill them?

LADY ANNE

Then say they were not slain.

Then tell me they’re alive.

But dead they are, and, devilish slave, by thee.

But dead they are, and – evil fiend – you killed them.

RICHARD, DUKE OF GLOUCESTER

I did not kill your husband.

I did not kill your husband.

LADY ANNE

Why then he is alive.

Then he’s alive then?

RICHARD, DUKE OF GLOUCESTER

Nay, he is dead, and slain by Edward’s hands.

No, he is dead, but he was killed by Edward.

LADY ANNE

In thy foul throat thou li’st! Queen Margaret saw

That’s a disgusting lie! Queen Margaret saw

Thy murd’rous falchion smoking in his blood;

Your murdering sword all covered in his blood;

The which thou once didst bend against her breast,

The same sword you once pointed at her heart

But that thy brothers beat aside the point.

Before your brothers knocked your sword aside.

RICHARD, DUKE OF GLOUCESTER

I was provoked by her sland’rous tongue,

She had provoked me with her slanderous words

That laid their guilt upon my guiltless shoulders.

By saying I was guilty when I wasn’t.

LADY ANNE

Thou wast provoked by thy bloody mind,

You were provoked by your blood-thirsty mind

That never dream’st on aught but butcheries.

That doesn’t think of anything but slaughter.

Didst thou not kill this king?

Did you not kill this king?

RICHARD, DUKE OF GLOUCESTER

I grant ye.

I give you that.

LADY ANNE

Dost grant me, hedgehog? Then God grant me too

You give me that, buffoon? Then God allow me

Thou mayst be damned for that wicked deed!

To damn you for that wicked deed you’ve done!

O, he was gentle, mild, and virtuous!

He was a kind and gentle decent man!

RICHARD, DUKE OF GLOUCESTER

The better for the King of Heaven that hath him.

That’s good for God in Heaven, who now has him.

LADY ANNE

He is in heaven, where thou shalt never come.

He is in heaven, where you’ll never get to.

RICHARD, DUKE OF GLOUCESTER

Let him thank me that help to send him thither;

He ought to thank me, helping him get up there;

For he was fitter for that place than earth.

For he was better suited there than earth.

LADY ANNE

And thou unfit for any place, but hell.

And you’re unfit for anywhere but hell.

RICHARD, DUKE OF GLOUCESTER

Yes, one place else, if you will hear me name it.

There’s one more place, if you will let me tell you.

LADY ANNE

Some dungeon.

A dungeon?

RICHARD, DUKE OF GLOUCESTER

Your bedchamber.

In your bedroom.

LADY ANNE

Ill rest betide the chamber where thou liest!

There’s no rest in a bedroom where you’re lying!

RICHARD, DUKE OF GLOUCESTER

So will it, madam, till I lie with you.

That’s true, madam, until I’ve slept with you.

LADY ANNE

I hope so.

I hope so, for you’ll never sleep with me.

RICHARD, DUKE OF GLOUCESTER

I know so. But, gentle Lady Anne,

I know I will. But, gentle Lady Anne,

To leave this keen encounter of our wits

Let’s cease trying to outwit one another

And fall something into a slower method:

And move into a slower conversation:

Is not the causer of the timeless deaths

Is not the one who caused these early deaths

Of these Plantagenets, Henry and Edward,

Of these Plantagenets, Henry and Edward,

As blameful as the executioner?

As guilty as the one who murdered them?

LADY ANNE

Thou wast the cause, and most accursed effect.

You were the cause as well as murderer.

RICHARD, DUKE OF GLOUCESTER

Your beauty was the cause of that effect –

Your beauty was the cause for what occurred:

Your beauty, that did haunt me in my sleep

Your beauty haunted me when I was sleeping,

To undertake the death of all the world,

Convincing me to kill all men alive

So I might live one hour in your sweet bosom.

So I might spend a tender hour with you.

LADY ANNE

If I thought that, I tell thee, homicide,

If I believed you, murderer, I tell you

These nails should rent that beauty from my cheeks.

My fingernails would make my cheeks look ugly.

RICHARD, DUKE OF GLOUCESTER

These eyes could not endure that beauty’s wrack;

I couldn’t watch you damage your own beauty;

You should not blemish it, if I stood by:

I wouldn’t let you do it, were I with you.

As all the world is cheered by the sun,

Much as the sun makes everybody happy,

So I by that; it is my day, my life.

Your face does that: it is my day and life.

LADY ANNE

Black night o’ershade thy day, and death thy life!

Then let your day be night, and death your life!

RICHARD, DUKE OF GLOUCESTER

Curse not thyself, fair creature – thou art both.

Don’t curse yourself, for you are day and life.

LADY ANNE

I would I were, to be revenged on thee.

I wish I was, so I could get revenge.

RICHARD, DUKE OF GLOUCESTER

It is a quarrel most unnatural,

It is a most unnatural disagreement

To be revenged on him that loveth thee.

To seek revenge on somebody who loves you.

LADY ANNE

It is a quarrel just and reasonable,

It is a rightly reasoned disagreement

To be revenged on him that killed my husband.

To seek revenge on him that killed my husband.

RICHARD, DUKE OF GLOUCESTER

He that bereft thee, lady, of thy husband,

That man that left you husbandless, my lady,

Did it to help thee to a better husband.

Did it to help you get a better husband.

LADY ANNE

His better doth not breathe upon the earth.

No man alive would be a better husband.

RICHARD, DUKE OF GLOUCESTER

He lives, that loves thee better than he could.

There’s one who loves you more than he could love you.

LADY ANNE

Name him.

Who’s that?

RICHARD, DUKE OF GLOUCESTER

Plantagenet.

Plantagenet.

LADY ANNE

Why, that was he.

Well, that was him.

RICHARD, DUKE OF GLOUCESTER

The self-same name, but one of better nature.

One with the same name, but one better natured.

LADY ANNE

Where is he?

Where is he?

RICHARD, DUKE OF GLOUCESTER

Here.

Here.

[She spits at him.]

Why dost thou spit at me?

Why do you spit at me?

LADY ANNE

Would it were mortal poison for thy sake!

If only it were poisonous to kill you!

RICHARD, DUKE OF GLOUCESTER

Never came poison from so sweet a place.

A poison never came from one so sweet.

LADY ANNE

Never hung poison on a fouler toad.

And poison never hit an uglier toad.

Out of my sight, thou dost infect mine eyes!

Get out! The sight of you infects my eyes!

RICHARD, DUKE OF GLOUCESTER

Thine eyes, sweet lady, have infected mine.

Your eyes, sweet lady, have infected mine.

LADY ANNE

Would they were basilisks, to strike thee dead!

If only they were venomed snakes to kill you!

RICHARD, DUKE OF GLOUCESTER

I would they were, that I might die at once;

I wish they were, so I could die right now;

For now they kill me with a living death.

For now, the sight of them is killing me.

Those eyes of thine from mine have drawn salt tears,

Those eyes of yours have made my eyes weep tears,

Shamed their aspects with store of childish drops:

And, shamefully, I’ve sobbed much like a child does;

These eyes, which never shed remorseful tear –

These eyes, that never cry out of remorse –

No, when my father York and Edward wept

No, when my father York and brother Edward

To hear the piteous moan that Rutland made

Wept hearing Edmund, Earl of Rutland, groan

When black-faced Clifford shook his sword at him;

When Clifford, that Lancastrian, raised his sword;

Nor when thy warlike father, like a child,

Nor when your battle-hardened father, childlike,

Told the sad story of my father’s death,

Told the sad story of my father’s death,

And twenty times made pause to sob and weep,

And twenty times he paused to sob and weep,

That all the standers-by had wet their cheeks

And made each person listening have wet cheeks

Like trees bedashed with rain – in that sad time

Like trees all soaked in rain – in all that sadness

My manly eyes did scorn an humble tear;

My manly eyes did not release a tear;

And what these sorrows could not thence exhale,

And though I never cried at all that sorrow,

Thy beauty hath, and made them blind with weeping.

Your beauty’s turned me blind with all my weeping.

I never sued to friend nor enemy;

I’ve never begged a friend nor enemy;

My tongue could never learn sweet smoothing word;

I’ve never learned to speak a flattering word;

But now thy beauty is proposed my fee,

But if your beauty will be my reward,

My proud heart sues, and prompts my tongue to speak.

My proud heart begs my tongue to flatter you.

[She looks scornfully at him.]

Teach not thy lip such scorn; for it was made

Don’t let your lips curl scornfully; they’re made

For kissing, lady, not for such contempt.

For kissing, lady, not to show contempt.

If thy revengeful heart cannot forgive,

If your revengeful heart cannot forgive me,

Lo here I lend thee this sharp-pointed sword,

Then I will lend you my sharp-pointed sword,

Which if thou please to hide in this true breast,

Which I ask that you stab right through my heart

And let the soul forth that adoreth thee,

So that my soul that loves you can be free;

I lay it naked to the deadly stroke,

Here is my naked chest that you can stab through,

And humbly beg the death upon my knee.

And humbly, on one knee, I ask you kill me.

[He lays his breast open: she offers at it with his sword.]

Nay, do not pause: for I did kill King Henry –

No, do not wait: for I have killed King Henry…

But ’twas thy beauty that provoked me.

Although it was your beauty that provoked me.

Nay, now dispatch: ’twas I that stabbed young Edward

Now, go ahead: I killed your husband Edward,

But ’twas thy heavenly face that set me on.

Despite the fact your beauty made me do it.

[She falls the sword.]

Take up the sword again, or take up me.

Pick up the sword again, or else take me.

LADY ANNE

Arise, dissembler! Though I wish thy death,

Get up, you cheat! Although I wish you dead,

I will not be thy executioner.

I will not be your executioner.

RICHARD, DUKE OF GLOUCESTER

Then bid me kill myself, and I will do it.

Then say that I must kill myself; I’ll do it.

LADY ANNE

I have already.

I have already.

RICHARD, DUKE OF GLOUCESTER

That was in thy rage.

That’s when you were angry.

Speak it again, and even with the word

Say it again, and as soon as you do,

This hand, which for thy love did kill thy love,

This hand, which killed your lover for I love you,

Shall for thy love kill a far truer love;

Shall, for your love, kill off a greater love;

To both their deaths shalt thou be accessary.

You’ll be accountable for both these deaths.

LADY ANNE

I would I knew thy heart.

I wish I knew your heart.

RICHARD, DUKE OF GLOUCESTER

’Tis figured in my tongue.

It is as I have told you.

LADY ANNE

I fear me both are false.

I fear that both are false.

RICHARD, DUKE OF GLOUCESTER

Then never was man true.

Then no man speaks the truth.

LADY ANNE

Well, well, put up your sword.

Well, put your sword away.

RICHARD, DUKE OF GLOUCESTER

Say then my peace is made.

Tell me I am forgiven.

LADY ANNE

That shalt thou know hereafter.

You’ll come to know that soon.

RICHARD, DUKE OF GLOUCESTER

But shall I live in hope?

But shall I live in hope?

LADY ANNE

All men, I hope, live so.

I hope all men have hope.

RICHARD, DUKE OF GLOUCESTER

Vouchsafe to wear this ring.

Oblige and wear this ring.

LADY ANNE

To take is not to give.

I’ll take it without duty.

RICHARD, DUKE OF GLOUCESTER

Look how my ring encompasseth thy finger,

Look how my ring encompasses your finger,

Even so thy breast encloseth my poor heart:

Just like my heart is buried in your breast:

Wear both of them, for both of them are thine.

Wear both of them, for both of them are yours.

And if thy poor devoted servant may

And if your poor devoted servant may

But beg one favour at thy gracious hand,

Ask one small favour from your lovely hand,

Thou dost confirm his happiness forever.

You will ensure his happiness forever.

LADY ANNE

What is it?

What is the favour?

RICHARD, DUKE OF GLOUCESTER

That it may please you leave these sad designs

It’s that you leave the funeral arrangements

To him that hath most cause to be a mourner,

To me, as I’ve more reason to be mourning,

And presently repair to Crosby House;

And right away go straight to Crosby House;

Where (after I have solemnly interred

Where – after I have humbly laid to rest

At Chertsey monast’ry this noble king,

This noble king at Chertsey monastery,

And wet his grave with my repentant tears)

And made his grave wet with repentant tears –

I will with all expedient duty see you.

I’ll come to visit you, quick as I can.

For diverse unknown reasons, I beseech you,

For several secret reasons, I must ask you

Grant me this boon.

To grant this wish to me.

LADY ANNE

With all my heart, and much it joys me too,

With all my heart, I grant your wish; I’m happy

To see you are become so penitent.

To see that you have now become remorseful.

Tressel and Berkeley, go along with me.

Tressel and Berkeley, come along with me.

RICHARD, DUKE OF GLOUCESTER

Bid me farewell.

Bid me a fond farewell.

LADY ANNE

’Tis more than you deserve;

You don’t deserve that;

But since you teach me how to flatter you,

But since you’ve taught me how to flatter you,

Imagine I have said farewell already.

Imagine I have said farewell already.

RICHARD, DUKE OF GLOUCESTER

Sirs, take up the corse.

Sirs, lift up the corpse.

GENTLEMAN

Towards Chertsey, noble lord?

And take it to Chertsey, my lord?

RICHARD, DUKE OF GLOUCESTER

No; to White-Friars, there attend my coming.

No; to White-Friars, and wait till I arrive.

[EXIT CORPSE WITH HALBERDS.]

Was ever woman in this humour wooed?

Has any woman in this mood been courted?

Was ever woman in this humour won?

Has any woman like this been seduced?

I’ll have her, but I will not keep her long.

I’ll win her over but won’t keep her long.

What? I, that killed her husband and his father,

What, me? Who killed her husband and his father,

To take her in her heart’s extremest hate,

To win her over whilst her heart detests me,

With curses in her mouth, tears in her eyes,

As she spits vulgar curses, teary eyed,

The bleeding witness of my hatred by,

The bleeding corpse she wails for right beside me,

Having God, her conscience, and these bars against me,

With God, her conscience, and her claims against me,

And I no friends to back my suit at all

Whilst I’ve no friends willing to back me up

But the plain devil and dissembling looks?

Except the devil and my feigning looks?

And yet to win her! All the world to nothing!

And yet, against the odds, I’ve won her over!

Hah!

Hah!

Hath she forgot already that brave prince,

Has she forgotten her brave prince already,

Edward, her lord, whom I, some three months since,

Her husband, Edward, whom, three months ago,

Stabbed in my angry mood at Tewksbury?

I stabbed in anger fighting him at Tewksbury?

A sweeter and a lovelier gentleman,

A sweeter and lovelier gentleman,

Framed in the prodigality of nature –

Endowed with every asset nature offers –

Young, valiant, wise, and (no doubt) right royal –

Young, brave and wise, and surely one day king –

The spacious world cannot again afford.

The type of man we’ll never see again.

And will she yet abase her eyes on me,

And now she’ll stoop to turn her eyes on me,

That cropped the golden prime of this sweet prince

That killed her darling prince whilst in his prime

And made her widow to a woeful bed?

And left her all alone, a mourning widow?

On me, whose all not equals Edward’s moi’ty?

On me, a man not half of Edward’s worth?

On me, that halts and am misshapen thus?

On me, a limping man, deformed like this?

My dukedom to a beggarly denier,

I’d bet my dukedom to a beggar’s penny,

I do mistake my person all this while!

I’ve got myself all wrong all of this time!

Upon my life, she finds (although I cannot)

I bet my life, she thinks (although I don’t)

Myself to be a marv’lous proper man.

That I’m a wonderfully good-looking man.

I’ll be at charges for a looking-glass,

I’ll have to go and buy myself a mirror,

And entertain a score or two of tailors

And hire twenty or forty personal tailors

To study fashions to adorn my body:

To choose the latest fashions I can wear:

Since I am crept in favour with myself,

Since I’ve begun to like myself again,

I will maintain it with some little cost.

It’s worth me spending money on myself.

But first I’ll turn yon fellow in his grave,

But first I’ll dump this fellow in his grave,

And then return lamenting to my love.

And then return remorseful to my love.

Shine out, fair sun, till I have bought a glass,

Until I’ve bought a mirror, shining sun,

That I may see my shadow as I pass.

Cast shadows showing me what I have done.